12.1.11

A Cup of Tea, or, A Real Writer





I slowly lift the tea bag up and watch it

     twirl     twirl
            twirl

          drip    

                 drip

                        drip

Then I wrap the string around it, wringing out the loose drops.

This cup of tea is an illusion.
It claims to be comforting.
I clasp its warmth in my dry hands
And my own stale breath rises to greet me as I
Blow on the hot auburn liquid. Sniffing steam.

Surely a real writer sits in the cold, dark morning sipping hot tea.

Surely a real writer doesn't get caught up staring out of the window
Into the darkness of the snowy morning...instead of writing.

Surely a real writer doesn't think too much.
Surely she isn't scared of the words hitting the page
Making them real.
Making herself real.

Words, memories, dreams piling up
Reconstructing the past
Wishing I hadn't thrown so much away
Wishing I remembered me more.
What I said, wrote, did, how I acted.

Long before this morning's cup of tea.

56 comments:

Life As I Know It said...

me too, Erin, me too...

Just replace tea with coffee at 5:50 this morning and that was me.

Angie said...

Oh, hon, you are most definitely a real writer.

This is absolutely beautiful, just so vivid and real. So glad you shared this!

cherry woodburn said...

You're definitely doing what real writers do. Ask Anne Lamott as 1 example and she's a fantastic, fairly prolific author/writer.

Beautifully written piece and I just want you to have beautifully felt peace. Hugs, Cherry

Annie @ astonesthrowfrominsanity said...

Oh my girl . . . I have sooooo been there.

Frustrating, no?

At least you got this beautiful piece out of it, you writer you!

Victoria KP said...

Wow, this really hits home for me. Don't worry, I'm pretty sure that staring out the window is a part of the writing process.

Liz said...

A post like this?? You're real writer times 10!

Nancy C said...

This humbles me. So good. So true and relatable. You are inspiring.

Pamela Hutchins said...

The beauty of not remembering is recreating to suit purpose. Better, worse, bigger, smaller, faster, slower, smarter, stump-dumb. It's all in those same hands that are fussing over a tea bag now ;)
Nicely done.
But, tell the truth...it seems you remember her well.
Because was she not exactly the uncertain, scared girl you just wrote about?

leigh said...

I love this.

Write it dirty first, it doesn't have to be perfect for a first draft. Get the words out without a critical eye.

tulpen said...

Maybe if you keep writing things like this? I'll be able to admit to myself what I've never been able to?

Maybe.

Lynn MacDonald said...

That was very poetic...you must be a real writer. As someone who's not...I can tell the difference.

Now I'm a bit jealous...no worries though...I was a mathematician!

Momma Fargo said...

Very real. Love it! You brought me right there with you...and now off to get a cup of tea.

Ami said...

Beautiful, Erin. Just beautiful. I love watching you evolve and unfold as a writer. You're an inspiration!

{Hugs} from on "real writer" to another.

Veronica said...

You, my friend, ARE a real writer. Through and through.

Whether you are staring out the window in deep thought or punching the keys of your laptop.

Your words are real and they are amazing!

The Random Blogette said...

As always, I am in awe of your writing. You are a real writer.

Angela C. said...

beautiful writing. even in the darkness and distraction you wrote something fabulous!

Eric 'Bubba' Alder said...

Nah, a REAL writer would be sipping scotch first thing in the morning, if all those stories I've heard are true. (LOL!)

(Me, I'm more of a coffee guy. But I'll also have tea on occasion - Lapsang Souchong)

From this, I'd say you were every bit a real writer.

nacherluver said...

Feelin' it, lovin' it.

Sounds like a real writer to me!

Allison Nazarian said...

"Wishing I remembered me more" <--- beautiful and bittersweet and so true

tsonodablog said...

Beautifully written, Erin, as always. I sense inner turmoil and questioning in most of your writing, yet it's all offered up differently and so eloquently. Real writer, yes.

Evonne said...

This is beautifully written. Yes, I think you are a real writer.

If a cold, dark morning with a cup of tea is motivation, than perhaps that's what I should try.

From Tracie said...

I'm sure that only real writers are able to admit that fear of the words hitting the page and then write about it!!

Wishing I remembered me more, and hadn't thrown so much away...that is me right there.

twelvedaysold said...

You're doing the most important part right now, which is writing even though you feel you may not have the correct inspiration or ideas. Just keep it up!

purejoy said...

nothing scarier than a blank screen.

a writer sips tea… and daydreams…
and a real writer does those things too… yet does it with poetry in her heart.

you my dear, are a poetic writer.
don't stop. ever.

singedwingangel said...

I get some of my best thoughts staring out a window. Seriously. I think that is the only time that God can get to my mind cause for once my brain isn't in constant motion. Giving Him the ability to breathe words into my mind that stir my writing..

Snuggle Wasteland said...

I'm assuming that all "real writers" think too much. It goes along with the whole tortured artist thing.

PS Of course you're a real writer. Don't be ridiculous.

Gigi said...

a real writer writes her truth. You are doin' it. Every.day.

Keep it up.

Miss Sadie said...

You can learn a lot about life by looking out a window, if you do so intentionally.

MiMi said...

VERY good. You REAL WRITER. :)

Not Just Another Jennifer said...

Surely a REAL WRITER wrote this. :) Beautiful.

Mommy Lisa said...

Loved that.

mama-face said...

"Wishing I remembered ME more"-profound.

girl, you ARE a REAL writer. xo

Davina K. Brewer said...

Very nice, always good to read something a little different, get my mind jumpstarted. I'm more of a coffee person, but totally feel this. When I saw the fleur de lis, I was like yes.. a fellow Louisianian. FWIW.

blueviolet said...

It's there. You just don't see it. We do.

Ed said...

Was this supposed to be arousing?

Or was the enuendo accidental?

Talk about a stiff drink.

I'll never look at tea the same way again.

Amy Oscar said...

A real writer, like you, writes. Beautiful post. Like a morning haiku. Simple, spare, aware.

Sherri said...

You, my dear? Are a real writer. Writing. Every day.

And that's what writers do.

Sometimes they may stare out the window. Or fall asleep. Or drink tea and write beautiful posts.

Katy said...

Love you, babe, and you surely don't need anyone to tell you that you're a writer--just look at the words.

Rachel said...

So beautiful. You are incredibly talented. I got chills reading it.

Mae Rae said...

Reading this made me smile. It is so often that I think that and don't realize that i do. you bring me to your morning cup of tea and for that you are a writer.

Elaine A. said...

A REAL WRITER does all those things because YOU did them. And YOU are one.

xoxoxo

KLZ said...

I see everyone has told you you are a real writer. Good. You are.

But why, why does me son like to shred tea bags? Does your writerly self have an answer for that?

T.J. said...

the talented always question their worth- that's how they get so good! Enjoy that tea!

Lady Jennie said...

Great job! I am so impressed with you! :-) The writing is beautiful. You must continue and find your niche, your groove.

(I didn't check in while traveling but I'm back now). And here's where we mentioned you: http://www.dustyearthmother.com/dusty/2011/01/how-to-entertain-a-fellow-blogger.html

Shelly said...

Surely a real writer could come up with a post like that... ;)

Helene said...

Trust me, it's there! Sometimes the process of writing is about the reflection...just sitting there in silence and letting your thoughts swirl around in your head before they get written down.

The mad woman behind the blog said...

SHUT UP!
This was wonderful! You captured the doubting voice word for word out of my head.

Surely, you are a real writer, my friend.

Raising my cup of tea to you now, and will think of this post all day. Your simple words will stay.here.with.me.

Joey @ Big Teeth and Clouds said...

Most writers have to spend time staring out the window. It's part of the "process!"

Two Normal Moms said...

Funny thing is that in writing this post, you did just that - made your thoughts real - made yourself real. Sure, you may have been putting off writing something else, but you still wrote. You can always look at it that way! I'm pretty sure there's a whole lot of writers who sit in dark mornings with tea or coffee staring out the window..
-Ally

julie said...

I'm sure you wouldn't be surprised to say I echo your sentiments (except insert "coffee" where you wrote "tea").

I have doubts about being a real writer all the time.

But I sip my coffee and put one word in front of the other. Or I stare out the window.

Because sometimes, you need to stare.

And that's when the best ideas come. Unbidden. Over a hot beverage. In the dark.

Carry on...

Kimberly said...

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
Where's the *love* button on this thing?!

Andrea (ace1028) said...

Beautifully written.

Arrows Sent Forth said...

I'm a tea drinker myself. Love your description at the start of this post... beautiful.

Look forward to connecting with you at Blissdom! Your writing is beautiful, I have a lot to learn from you!

Mom of the Perpetually Grounded said...

Wonderful! I absolutely love this. Can identify with every part, starting with the tea.

Jenna said...

being real.
yeah, it's scary.
to anybody.

Thank you for being real, let me encourage you that the best content you write will be what comes from your heart, and it's what makes your voice unique and connects you with the kind of audience you want to have to engage with. (Lesson from Blissdom 10!) *HUG*

Ann Imig said...

The only person who can ever decide you're a writer is you.

The tricky part is not actually the identity but showing up for the work in my opinion.

And you're already doing that.

 

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