26.1.11

Dude, Where's My Blog?

So I'm here.
At Blissdom. In Nashville.
All I can say is?

It's eleven kinds of awesome.

Part of me feels like I don't belong here
Amongst all these super smart people.
(This is not just the low-brow Chardonnay talking)

I have a lot of work to do
But I need your help.
That means honest input, critiques, and comments.

I cannot be objective about my own work. I can't step away.

I'm afraid. Afraid of my writing, afraid of myself.
Afraid that my life will be reduced to getting crunk at cronferences.
Just dreaming about the writer I could be.
Instead of taking chances---submitting posts for publication and not caring whether "they" accept something or not. Have to keep trying. Practicing.

I'm afraid of saying things. Things that will alienate you.
Things that might even scare me. I'm not sure what's underneath,
This dinosaur buried in the rubble. I'm chipping away slowly,
Because fear is a dirty fool.

But I am still here.
It's a first step.

I love you all.
Thank you for reading.
There are no real words.
I am grateful and scared and humbled here.
I will never be a "big blogger," but I don't wanna be.
I wanna be the girl next door. Who's a writer.
Who you love to stop by and read.

Because that is who I am.

37 comments:

Ren- Lady Of The Arts said...

I always love to stop by and read!!!

KLZ said...

You are the girl next door :)

Love you

June Freaking Cleaver said...

We're all insecure about something - maybe it's our writing, or our parenting skills/styles, or our physical appearance.

I found the best way to gain confidence is to act "as if" - if you talk less about your fear, people won't notice that you're afraid.

Try on confidence - it'll look great on you!

Rock on!

Natalie said...

You are next door.. Or at least down the hall somewhere from where I am.
Wish I could've met you tonight, but we def. need to find each other tomorrow.
Coffee should be consumed. Let's make a date.

From Tracie said...

You are definitely the writer that I stop by and read....now if only you actually lived next door to me!

First steps are huge!

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

There's nothing you can write that would keep me from coming back. You have a fan of your writing in me. I promise that I will be honest about your writing though if you need input. Other than that, I'm excited to hear all that you grab from being at Blissdom..

tsonodablog said...

Hey girlie. I'll always be reading you. Have to follow such a lovely person, with talent and heart.

Cheryl said...

Thing is, we are ALL insecure.

So you are in good company.

Be brave.

You have more support than you know.

JadeLD said...

So jealous of you! I wish I could be there and meet all the awesome bloggers there - including you. I hope you have a great few days, I'm sure you're going to learn so much, make sure you enjoy it, you really do belong there!

Rachel said...

I know I've demonstrated time and time again how insecure I am about my writing and you have always empowered me. You are very b rave to so explicity express your emotions as you attend Blissdom. Write on, my friend, as I will always be back to read on. Have fun!

varunner said...

I always love to stop by and read. Your words have beauty and truth, in every post.

Joann Mannix said...

My fear cripples me sometimes. A writer's worst enemy.

Just. Do. It.

Go out and thrill the world with your words. Bring em forth. Kick that self doubt to the curb because you, my dear, have it in you.

And have fun at Blissdom while you're at it.

MommaKiss said...

I wish you were next door to me! Just enjoy yourself, lady.

singedwingangel said...

Wait you are in Nashville.. so logistically speaking your are roughly about 5 flippin hours from me?? ACCCKKKKKKKK.. so I could have 9 if I had the time and gas money) come to Nashville and MEET you and talk to you and go just hang out with you.
Crap. Just seriously crap now I am all disappointed. I think a blogging conference needs to be held in KY.

tulpen said...

I'm gonna be the crazy drunk next door.

The Random Blogette said...

You know I love your writing. And let me tell you just because you are not a "big blogger" doesn't mean that you are not even more amazing than those "big bloggers". You are true to your self and so honest in your writing. That is why I continue to read your blog. It also helps that I just think that you are all kinds of awesome as a person too! Have fun!

TKW said...

A blog conference is amazing and overwhelming, and I think it's natural to spend the aftermath kind of in a fog of confusion for a while.

But I do enjoy coming here and hearing what you have to say,

KittyCat said...

You can count on me. Ill be here.

I dont think I could ever do a "blog" conference. Just too much for me.

BUt I bet you would rock it!

Evonne said...

Fear is powerful and can be overwhelming. Not everyone will like or be able to relate to what we write and rejection is a part of life. But there are people out there who will continue to read and you will never know unless you put it out there.

Your blog is one of the places I come for inspiration. I have pulled out pieces I wrote years ago with the intent of touching them up. And hopefully creating more. Thank you!

Mom of the Perpetually Grounded said...

I don't do blog conferences but I'm a veteran of trade shows. One thing I learned is to put yourself out there like you own the world even if you don't feel it yourself and people will stop to look. The competition isn't better or worse. No matter how big they are. People make choices based on what speaks to them and your voice should be heard. The most important thing is Enjoy yourself, take advantage of the learning opportunities and have fun with the free crunk!

foxy said...

I love this post. Just you being you... so honest. Enjoy the rest of your time there.

julie said...

Well I'm too scared to even go to a blog conference, so you're way ahead of me.

Or nextdoor to me.

Or whatever.

Either way, you rock, Erin.

And lowbrow Chardonnay can be surprisingly medicinal when it needs to be.

Enjoy.

Hope said...

We're all reading.... so you must be doing something right! :)

GunDiva said...

You know, Erin, I love your blog. I avoid blogging conferences like the plague, because I like what I do and I don't want it to be a "job" - I like to write and some people like to read what I write. I don't want to feel inferior or not good enough because I've surrounded myself with over-achieving bloggers.

There is one major thing that blogging has helped with and it's my outlook on life. When something absolutely ridiculous happens, instead of getting mad, I find the funny side of it so I can blog and laugh about it with my followers. Just the change in mindset has been wonderful.

Pamela Hutchins said...

And I do love to read you, although technically Kansas City is a long drive...
Have fun, learn alot, come wow your readers.

MiMi said...

You're the girl next door who happens to live a few states away. And I love to read you.

The Empress said...

I know it's intimidating when you are surrounded by so much talent, and see so many beautiful words so perfectly strung together by the most eloquent writers.

But, look at it this way, you didn't scare us away.

The Twin Spin said...

You ARE a great writer. I'm sure you're holding your own with all those peeps at Blissdom. Writing is so personal, it's terrifying sometimes to put it out there (as was my past life as an artist - I hated showing my work to people). Keep up the great work.

BigSis said...

You are awesome and I would love to get crunk at a cronference with you!

Practical Parenting said...

Fear of people knowing my true thoughts stops me sometimes. Often, I write things that I don't post. Just to work on my writing. Then when I'm sure that it's right, it might be ready to post.

You are already awesome.

leigh said...

You have to do it even though you're scared because what you've been given is a gift. Your fear will push and inspire you. Use your past as a muse.

I will always stop by and read your thoughts.

adayinmynyc.com said...

You are!
The girl next door I love to read!
And the big blogger!
See what I see!
xo Have fun!

Much More Than Mommy said...

I'm hoping to stop by more -- I have missed you a lot, and I look forward to reading you, feeling like I'm "next door" to an amazing woman and amazing writer. <3

Raoulysgirl said...

I'm LATE! That seems to be my theme lately, but I'm rolling with it!!!

I honestly think that once you can totally embrace this "say what you feel" kind of thing, you might find yourself finally FREE! Sure, you may lose some people along the way...but when it all comes down to it...

Does it matter? You need to surround yourself with people that love you for who you are...that includes those of us who read your blog. If you're holding back, you're not being true to yourself OR your readers. Be true. It comes down to the old saying...

Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

I can't wait to continue on this journey with you. And it looks like I'm not the only one!!! <3

mama-face said...

You know Erin, I am proud and a little bit jealous that you attend these blog conferences. It would intimidate the heck out of me for sure. Of course, I'm not in your league... but I have a secret wish (well not so secret), to go to a blog conference. Too observe if nothing else.

So, way to go! You're 11 kinds of awesome, girl.

gayle said...

Don't be afraid!! That will hold you back! I'm not a writer but my daughter is....sort of. She's a English teacher. Plus she is getting her Master's in English. From talking to her......you have to write and rewrite and people have to tell you honestly how they feel about your writing.
Good luck to you! Have a wonderful time ....can't wait to hear more.

Nicole said...

YOU are the WRITER who is the girl next door!

I wish for you the vision I see of you. <3

YOU ARE A WRITER.

Your blog is authentic and amazing. Just like you!
Sometimes you are bright and cheery, sometimes not. I applaud you for not hiding from any part of you that causes others to get squirmy! Your enoughness is flooding out of you. Don't try to stop it or change it!

I love your blog, I love you. that is all for now.

 

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